29 10 / 2013
I used to think I feared people walking out of my life, feared losing them - feared them leaving. It wasn’t until recently I realised I never really did. Perhaps it was through the process of self-discovery, reflection that somehow managed to rationalise the irrational.
The people in our lives are akin to the ocean’s waves, a process of approaching and leaving, taking with it a vestige, breaking down a whole only to create something much more beautiful. And with that, comes acceptance and letting go. I’ve read somewhere that there is always a reason behind meeting certain people in your lifetime, either you need them to change your life or they need you to change theirs. Also that, some people come into your life only to reach you how to let go.
Experiences as of late, have taught me that letting go, letting people walk out of my life and also walking out of theirs, isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s what we need sometimes, a break. A break to gain some clarity, to notice the important aspects we’ve been missing out on and also a chance to grow from the pain. In retrospect, I know I’m stronger, from yesterday’s pain and I wouldn’t even trade the most hurtful experiences for anything.
I no longer have that fear. If someone were to walk out of my life or if I have the misfortune of having to walk out on someone, I’d do it willingly. After all, sometimes we are only meant to cross paths with someone and not have them in our lives till the end. Yet that doesn’t undermine the impact they’ve had in our lives. Though it may have been short, it’s the lessons learnt that stick with us.
If you have to leave or if I have to walk out on you, I sincerely hope our paths cross again in a place where we’re able to still smile and wish each other well.